15. When real people go to jail it’s frowned upon. When celebrities go to jail it’s unfair and too harsh of a sentence.
14. Eating healthy, results in cooking something healthy. Eating healthy results in your chef cooking something healthy.
13. When people take pictures of you they’re tagged on Facebook. When people take pictures of you they’re tagged on PEOPLE.
12. When you’re an intern you do things such as get coffee, scan, and file. When you’re a celebrity intern you do things such as go to photo shoots, meet designers, and suddenly become famous.
11. Attending fashion week means your “cool” at least to your friends. Attending fashion week as a celebrity means only going if you’re in the first 3 rows.
10. If you’re wearing high-waisted pleated pants you’re probably an outdated mom. If you’re wearing high-waisted pleated pants you’re probably in style.
9. If you’re on Twitter no one really cares. If you’re on Twitter a million people care.
8. You shop Zac Posen and Eugenia Kim…at Target. You shop Zac Posen and Eugenia Kim.
7. The top 3 rumors that often spread about real people: they’re eggo is prego, they got fired from their job, or they’ve gained weight. The top 3 rumors often spread about celebrities: they’re aliens, they’re anorexic, or they’ve just got plastic surgery.
6. Old men date old women. Old men date hot young chicks?
5. We pay a cover to get into a club. Clubs pay celebrities to get into a club.
4. If you drape yourself in Kermit the Frog your considered to be weird. If you drape yourself in Kermit the Frog it’s called art.
3. Dressing like you’re grandmother means wearing Alfred Dunner. Dressing like your grandmother means your rolling in high fashion.
2. Finding a good bar means finding quarter beers. Finding a good bar means finding a hot crowd.
1. We live in cities where shows are made about: Scranton…Indianapolis…Cleveland. They live in cities where Rich Housewives have their own shows: New York…Atlanta…Orange County.